Playing to Win

I taught a chess class today. Nearly an hour was spent with two kindergartners trying to grasp the basics of the game. The main problem was that they didn’t really want a grasp of the basics. They wanted to win. Period. Joining the class, sitting through a lesson, setting up the pieces had only one purpose: to cheer “checkmate” and grab the opposing king off the board. But they often forgot how the pieces move. They struggled with no idea which pieces were best to move. They cried and whined with each piece lost. And they failed to learn that you never actually take your opponent’s king off the board in a real game of chess.

The desire to win was so strong that these two young friends resorted to alternating between making fun of the other and lamenting that defeat was the only option for themselves. Interestingly, they often were both upset about losing at the same time. If they were not far ahead of the other player, they were losing. Losing is about perspective. As the chess teacher, I intervened just enough to help each player keep taking pieces (so they would see how to make those moves), to keep it interesting (so they wouldn’t lose heart if nothing seemed to be happening), and so that they were nearly tied the whole game (which led to them both believing they were losing). Although they were getting some assistance, I was happy to see the boys playing their best game yet. They were making good moves. This was what mattered to me because this would help them in the long run. I thought they were both winning in important ways. Chess is useful to help develop strategic thinking, planning ahead, problem solving, patience, and discipline. These higher level skills develop only after you understand the basics of the game. Unfortunately, my two students didn’t care. They were so concerned about counting how many pieces had been taken that they missed the bigger lessons (and they forgot to have fun).

I realize these two children are young and this kind of behavior is expected from them at times. Yes, we grow up and realize there are some things we must learn before we can benefit and really enjoy many experiences. So we get driving lessons before taking off in the car. We go to school for years to be prepared for a job. We listen to weekly sermons on right living and seeking God. We get all set up - just how my students started out - but once the game starts, do we just go for the win and maybe miss the purpose of our own life games? I think there is more to life than achieving our goals. That’s a big statement. We can set excellent goals for ourselves: an inviting home, loving family, numerous friends and a successful career. Don’t get me wrong, these things are good. But is it possible that solely aiming for the end product is getting in the way of other goals God may have for our lives?

The more I learn about God’s ways, the more I tend to see that they are not like mine (”For My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the LORD. “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.” Isaiah 55:8-9)! I look at life the way I’ve been taught by the world and my own selfish nature: to strive for good things and rejoice when they come my way. I don’t know that I’d feel I’d lost anything if the perfect job, house, and even family just appeared one day and I could feel successful. But I would have missed out on the bigger lessons that are the real point of this game. Thankfully, God knows me well enough to not just hand me every desire of my heart at once. I would dash for them, declare myself the winner, and not need my Teacher anymore.